:D

work tonight wasnt so bad!
it was kinda fun,
i dont mind working with tara and nicole at all, they are pretty amusing
:)
buti wokred with brittni and vanice as welll
:)

then ryan picked me up from work
and we came to my house and chilled and such

it was fun,
i cant wait for tomorrow niiiight
cause we are going to the BEACH :D

i'm excited!

but i don't know if you are hehe.

i can't wait to go to the beach!

i got woken up this morning by nacho and josie barking at these strange men outside my house. i dont really know why they were there but then i went back to sleep and woke back up at 10.

nothing has really happened yet today, so im not sure why im posting so early anyways.
...
just to say that im excited for the beach :)

so,

today was pretty boring.
then i went to go get my prescription sunglasses
and THEY WERE CLOSED

meh.. and that ruined my whole idea for my 365 today..
and now i think i did something gay. oh well

im becomming kind of nervous about the beach now.
cause ryan is going with me
and i hope he can stand me for 5 days straight
and..waking up in the morning, oh boy.

oh well though
im sure it will be fine, and fun.

anyways
i had a lot of fun with him tonight, i wen tover to his house and we were pretty much gay the whole time.
yyeah!

yesterday <3

was relaxing, and nice.
i went with ryan to Frederick for his shoot, and we went to this really nice place
i sneaked in some shots of my own.
haahah

after we went there, we went to my house and pretty much slept on my hammock.
it was really nice.
and really nice out.
i felt like i was already at the beach, with my eyes closed, laying on the sand.

im excited to go on vacation, ryan is coming with me.
it will be interesting cause karly and her boyfriend are coming too.
oh well, i plan on doing our own thing and havin fun.
:)
i can't wait

AND FINALLY dani works with me tonight! :D
im so excited , i misssed her!
but i work 4 to 10 and its HOT out so im not really looking forward to the night.

well thats about all, im going to go exercise

dear _______

yesterday i broke my new lens.
which was really upsetting even thought it was cheap..

and yeah.
i work tonight for the first time this WHOLE week. how lovely.

and im leaving for the beach on friday night im pretty sure :)

i cant wait.

oh yeah.
i need to loose weight , so im gonna.
im tired of this extra fat. i need to tone up, or something,
i just got upset about it this morning so yeah..

DEAR BLOG

i cannot wait for today to be over.

i really really hope that, it can just be....sort of fun,

bye.

i just wanted to say.

something to a particular someone.
who i don't think reads this blog of mine much

considering every time i ask he asks for the link
lol

but.
today , or yesterday, was a year and 11 months with you.
which i think is amazing,
cause i can be kinda psycho sometimes
and i cant wait for the next month..
or the next how ever long..

so many things i want to tell youuu.


but bottom line.
you're amazing, the best.

dear, whoever reads this.

or whoever cares.

im in a crappy mood today

due to the fact that i only work one day this whole week, and only 7 to 10.

another thing, i am just in a crappy mood from last night.

i dont know why it had to carry over.
probably just because i am so bored.
and i feel like things aren't right with someone...


whatever.
:\

well in other news...
my teeth are still straight.
went to my orthodontist appointment today.

uggggggghhhh
i wish i could drive on my own cause id get OUT of here.
get something good to eat.
and go to borders.
i wish id get to see someone but i don't know. heh.

maybe later ill be..happier!

but anyways i feel really sticky and gross cause i just exercisesd a little
im out of shape.
and the sweat wont stop dripping down my face.
its annoying.



i feel intentionally ignored.

tonight

is not good at all.

wow.

just wow.
i
i
i got a car today.
an 08 ford focus
32 mpg

AHHH
and ilove lovelvoeloe love it
so much


but im not even sure if im able to keep it


I CANT EVEN DRIVE ALONE YET


this is wrong, i dont deserve it..


im excited

not only for my car

but, i've almost been with ryan for 2 years.
2 long and short years.
cause..
i know its gonna be much longer.
i hope..
i love him, and im happy, and these past almost two years have been THE best ever.
and i've loved learning about him.
just saying.

well i'm happy

cool.

nice to have this thing so now i can rant about what no one really cares about.

my sister pisses me off so much.

she claims that i depend on hanging out with ryan too much.
wtf.
what does that even MEAN?
how is when i hang out with him any different then when she hangs out with her boyfriend?
SERIOUSLY
like she just pisses me off.
and then i told her about why amber got mad at me.

of course she was on her side of the argument.

whatever.
bitch bitch bitch.

i really hate her sometimes.

i do not see any wrong in hanging out with your boyfriend.
at all.

whatemtriwgjnmwolfme!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

D:<

my head.

i can't really sort it all out sometimes.
i do not at all understand why i act the way i do.
why i react the way i do to things..

it's upsetting.

then there are those times when i just want to cry but i have no big reason,
something little sets me off and then i cant hold it back. tears of happiness, tears of sadness, a mixture.

i just wish i knew if someone understands.

for sure.

but im good now.
im happy.

you know what i am excitedd for?

the beach, im excited for the beach.

i don't know

what to say.
i have ice cream in my hair right now, it's annoying.
im not in a bad mood nor a fantastic one.
im just right.

i got more of the hours i wanted at work this week,
and its been crazy busy lately.
it makes me so tired.

but when i want to sleep i cant, i just have to lay there for a while.

i dont work with dani at all this week.
which is upsetting.
:(
i need to hang out with her soon.

i am bored.

today.

was nice enough,
i went driving with my mom,
spent some time with ryan, and i really enjoyed his company.
he's amazing ;)

then i got really boredddddd...
but thats okay.

sometimes i guess it's nice to be left alone.

here are some photos.

my 365 today, which i am REALLY happy with.
i think im starting to gain some confidence with my photography..

here is something gay!

am i cool?

anyways..
i miss dani.
and i misss jessa and sarah.
and i really want to do something to my hair,
which i will,
tomorrow
but i want a peek a boo again!
so i guess we will see what i get to do.

i even miss ryan.

that is all for now.

jealous

im tired of getting jealous.

i had a really short dream this morning.

i was watching this happen; it was underwater and there was a photoshoot going on and at first it started with one girl, then i saw a lot of people swimming above the water and they all came down and formed a tube but there was one spot missing, where that girl should have been

i wish i knew what dreams meant.

it doesnt matter

to me if anyone pays attention to this blog at all

as long as..if someone does,they enjoy it.

lately ;

i have been trying to figure out what piercing i want to get. i have NO idea if i want my belly button done, my cartilage, somethin fancy in my ear..im lost with that whole dream.

uhhh...
i got more hours at my job, so im happy about that.
...

i wonder why i must be the way i am.
like even when i want to change for ME i will still slip back into old thoughts..rather than habits.
i dont really have any bad habits other than eating junk.
but anyways, i have had anxiety issues in the past, and i usually feel like i am over them but sometimes it just comes back. not fully like last time but still..
it sucks when you obsess over things in your mind that aren't even important.

and you can't really help it until
you just forget you were even thinking
about it in the first place.

it just sucks.

someone asked me to shoot them!
like with a camera.
and it excites me that people actually like the work(, i guess you could call it work)
that i do.
but i have this problem, i get nervous and shy and just weird when it comes to doing a photoshoot.
i guess im just not good with people?
but i AM good with people ..ish.
i dont really know how to explain myself.
this is where it ends tonight.

ramble

i don't choose what i want to ramble about, i believe it chooses me

the moon has been so beautiful lately.

ahh so i worked tonight and i'd like to rant about the annoying things people do at the ice cream shop. not in any specific order.

number one:
it's really irritating when they just assume im ready to take their order and yell what they want at me, what if my hands were really sticky and i wanted to wash them hm?
what if i needed to sneeze, or cough? yeah.
and i also just think this is just rude..and annoying.

number two:
talking really quiet.
i can't really hear over the snowball machine,
the blender,
the loud obnoxious people behind you.

number three:
talking really loud.
i do NOT appreciate being yelled at.
i am the nice girl serving you ice cream.

number four:
POINTING at the flavor you want wayyyy over there rather than just reading the darn sign telling you what flavor it is.
"you want this?"
"yes that one"
"this one?"
"NO, that one"
"this one?"
etc.
it'd be a lot easier if you could just read and tell me what you want, rather than point.

number five:
big groups in general, weather they are nice or not.

number six:
when people come in last minute and order, two smoothies, 3 banana spilts, 2 small cones.
you know.

well thats it really.
of course i like to be super dramatic about this.
cause i guess people can't help it.

i just ate too much ice cream andd i now feel like barfing!

thats the downer, about working at an ice cream shop.
i can eat any ice cream i want, for free.
so, you concequently gain a few pounds.
and feel sick..

oh and i did this today too,
yeah, down there

how come..?

hi,
im gretchen
and for some reason whenever my boyfriend (ryan) tells me to start things,i do. like this blog, like my 365 project, but usually these things are good for me and occupy my time.

so, how come

everytime it comes to me craving to be creative i can't.

i cant really think of anything to say right now..

but i guess ill just ramble about my day.

i cleaned my room a little,
took my 365
yeah, up there.

i really like it today, i love it usually everyday unless i am busy and/or lazy and dont get to it until later.
i think it will really expand my creative mind,
especially since ill be going to tech this fall for digital communications,
im pretty excited to learn.
well i wanted to post another photo but it isnt letting me,
so im going to go eat dinner now..or something.
i work soon.
ill share more later.